Baby B

Behind the name

June 23, 2009 at 1:31 pm

So, I’m a big name geek and was reading websites about baby names years before we even got pregnant. I started baby name lists back when I was in college (and am still waiting to see one of these, Noël!). Jon, on the other hand, could not have cared less about names. In the beginning, every time I  broached the subject with him, he said he would come up with a list “by next week” and that we would compare our lists then. He never did.

I continued to add to my list for several months and, when Jon consistently only gave me his one and only name choice, I simply started throwing my options at him to get his response. He was heavy handed with the veto power, and quickly discarded about 90% of my list. Almost all of his reasons were familiarity – “I went to high school with a girl with that name,” or “That reminds me of the character on [whatever TV show].” He was a tough critic. He only really liked two of my options, and even those took a while to grow on him.

So, then I decided to take another route and we talked “naming criteria.” I love many of the names that are currently popular out there, such as Sophia, Olivia, and Lillian – names from the turn of the 20th century that are decidedly feminine but also strong and historic with great nickname potential.  However, I definitely wanted a name that was not extremely popular (I wanted to avoid at least the top 100).  Basically, I didn’t want her to be one of 3 so-and-sos in her class – the dilemma faced by every Jennifer from my generation.

Yet it was even more important to me that the name be easily pronounced and spelled. Having had to explain and spell my name my whole life has been irritating to say the least. That, coupled with the fact that our family surname is no picnic either, made it a priority for me that our girl have a recognizable first name. I also wanted a name that was classic, historic, and maybe literary. I am not at all a fan of trendy and “kr8tively” spelled names. I wanted something that would sound dignified and timeless as an adult.

Finally, there were little considerations. I thought a three-syllable name sounded best with our last name. I also wanted the name to be at least loosely tied to our heritage. We both are completely European – mine’s mainly Irish and English, his is Portuguese and then a mix of other nationalities. In terms of meaning, I thought one that related to nature would be nice. And, for some strange reason, I found myself repeatedly drawn to the letters V and F in the names that I chose.

Jon also wanted to avoid popular names, but he took it further. He didn’t care if no one had heard of the name, or even if it was hard to spell. He really wanted a name with ties to mythology that had an interesting character and story attached to it. He also thought a nature meaning would be nice. He was not attached to a certain number of syllables, as long as it sounded nice with our last name. He also liked both V and F, and additionally wanted a name that “typeset well.” Hey, he’s a graphic designer.

About a month before our little one was born, we had finally agreed on the following three names: Fiona, Sylvia, and Freya. Fiona came from a dream I had when I was about 2 months pregnant. I had dreamed that I had a three year-old daughter with curly blonde hair and Jon’s eyes. She was a feisty little thing who was giving me a very hard time at the park, and I called her Fiona several times during that dream. Freya was Jon’s contribution. She is the Norse goddess of love, beauty, and fertility.

I really liked Freya, but worried that it was too unknown in the United States and that people would have a hard time pronouncing it and spelling it. Indeed, the more people I told about it, the more questions I got – Is it pronounced “free-ya?” “How do you spell it?” etc. We also found out that “fea” (pronounced fay-a) means “ugly” in Spanish, and I worried about the teasing potential. After many discussions about the pros and cons, we eventually decided to let Freya go.

We quickly agreed on Grace as a middle name to honor my late grandmother, of whom we were both very fond. She was a very spunky old lady with a sharp sense of humor and a surprisingly progressive and open-minded way of looking at the world. These are characteristics we hope our daughter will have, as well.

So, in terms of a first name, it was down to Sylvia (Latin, meaning”of the woods”) and Fiona (Irish, meaning “fair,beautiful”). We decided that we would meet our daughter and decide which one suited her best.  In my mind, a Sylvia would be darker in coloring with a more reserved, contemplative nature. A Fiona would be much like the little girl of my dream – fair, blonde, and feisty. We had a pretty equal chance of having either kind of kid.

Well, wouldn’t you know it, our baby girl came out just as fair/blonde AND calm/observant as you could imagine. Huh. I couldn’t wrap my brain around it. Jon, on the other hand, was sure that she should be Sylvia right from the start. It just felt right to him. I needed more time to think about it, and took almost another 24 hours to get to know her. She was a very quietly alert baby and spent a lot of time just staring into my eyes. I tried both names on her, and Fiona just felt less and less right, even though that was my “blonde name.” She also had the cutest little pointy ears (which are not like anyone’s ears on either side), and eyes which her daddy quickly dubbed “elf eyes.” So, she looked a bit like a wood nymph, and it was almost as if the name Sylvia had chosen her. So, by 6:00 PM the day after her birth, I finally announced to everyone that she would be called Sylvia Grace.

We are very pleased with our choice, and are sure that it suits her very well at this point. We almost exclusively call her Sylvie, which is the French version of Sylvia and a name in its own right (much like Sophie is to Sophia). It sound perfect with our very French last name. Sylvia, though, gives her a slightly more “grown-up sounding” option, should she want it when she’s older.

To some people, the name Sylvia may seem not quite ready for a revival. It was most popular in the 1930s, and so there are still elderly Sylvias out there making it feel, perhaps, like a “little old lady name.”  Neither Jon nor I knew any Sylvias, so that was never an issue for us.  When we agreed on it, we simply heard a lovely sounding classic name that was very similar (and yet a step removed) from the antique revival names that are so popular right now. We also loved the meaning and the nickname. It’s a name that travels well and is used in many parts of the world.  And, even Shakespeare agrees on her merits (although not the spelling):

Who Is Silvia?

Who is Silvia? what is she,

That all our swains commend her?

Holy, fair, and wise is she;

The heaven such grace did lend her,

That she might admirèd be.

Is she kind as she is fair?

For beauty lives with kindness.

Love doth to her eyes repair,

To help him of his blindness,

And, being helped, inhabits there.

Then to Silvia let us sing,

That Silvia is excelling;

She excels each mortal thing

Upon the dull earth dwelling:

To her let us garlands bring.

William Shakespeare

By phillygil | Posted in Uncategorized